If I Had Legs I’d Kick You Movie 9xFlixM4UF

Rating: 9.5
Author: Laba Das

The stale smell of antiseptic hung heavy in the air as Linda stared, unblinking, at the ceiling. Her daughter, the usually vibrant Delaney Quinn, lay pale and still in the hospital bed, caught in the grip of a mysterious illness that baffled the doctors. Days bled into weeks, punctuated only by the hollow pronouncements of medical professionals and the increasingly erratic advice from her unconventional therapist, a deadpan comedian named Conan O’Brien. At home, her husband was conspicuously absent, lost in a haze of work and denial, and when she seeks a friendly face to help alleviate her troubles she runs into James, a friendly face with his own hidden agenda. Adding to the chaos, her sharp-tongued friend, Caroline, vanished without a trace, leaving behind only a cryptic voicemail and a gnawing sense of unease. Linda’s world was fracturing, each broken piece reflecting a desperate question: How much can one woman bear before she finally kicks back?

If I Had Legs I’d Kick You Movie Overview

Title	If I Had Legs I’d Kick You
Release Status	Released
Release Date	2025-10-10
Runtime	1 hours and 53 minutes
Genre	Drama, Comedy
Original Language	En
Spoken Language	English
Country	United States of America
Production Co.	A24, Central Pictures, Fat City, Bronxburgh

If I Had Legs I’d Kick You Movie Cast

Name	Character
Rose Byrne	Linda
Conan O’Brien	Therapist
A$AP Rocky	James
Danielle Macdonald	Caroline
Delaney Quinn	Child
Mary Bronstein	Dr. Spring
Ivy Wolk	Diana
Mark Stolzenberg	Parking Attendant
Manu Narayan	Landlord
Eva Kornet	Breathworker
Ella Beatty	Kate
Helen Hong	Eva
Daniel Zolghadri	Stephen
Josh Pais	Brad
Ronald Bronstein	Caroline’s Husband (voice)
Lark White	Vanessa
Christian Slater	Father
Laurence Blum	Police Officer
Amy Judd Lieberman	Melanie
Char Sidney	Nurse
Jodi Michelle Pynn	Nurse

If I Had Legs I’d Kick You Movie Storyline

Linda, portrayed by Rose Byrne, finds her meticulously constructed life unraveling when her child, Delaney Quinn, begins exhibiting baffling symptoms of an unidentifiable illness. Her husband’s increasing detachment and unexplained absences only exacerbate her distress, leaving Linda feeling isolated and overwhelmed. Seeking solace, she turns to therapy, but her sessions with her Therapist, played by Conan O’Brien, devolve into a bizarre and adversarial relationship, offering little comfort and instead fueling her growing anxiety. As Linda struggles to juggle her child’s health crisis, marital woes, and the increasingly unhelpful therapy, a local man mysteriously disappears, further unsettling her already fragile equilibrium. She unexpectedly forms an unlikely bond with James, a charismatic but enigmatic street artist played by ASAP Rocky, who offers a different perspective on her situation. Driven to the edge, Linda begins her own investigation into the missing person, suspecting a connection to the strange occurrences surrounding her. Danielle Macdonald, as Caroline, a neighbor and acquaintance, provides sporadic moments of genuine support, but her own complicated life prevents her from fully engaging in Linda’s turmoil. Ultimately, Linda must confront not only the external mysteries plaguing her but also her own internal struggles and repressed emotions to save her family and reclaim her sanity, discovering that the real answers lie closer to home than she ever imagined, and perhaps, the strength to kick back at the absurdities of her life has been there all along.

If I Had Legs I’d Kick You Movie Details

In the darkly comedic drama, “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You,” Linda, portrayed by Rose Byrne, finds her carefully constructed world teetering on the brink of collapse. Grappling with her child’s puzzling illness, she simultaneously navigates the emotional absence of her husband, a perplexing missing person case, and a progressively strained relationship with her unconventional therapist, played by Conan O’Brien. Set against the backdrop of a seemingly ordinary suburban landscape, the film explores themes of isolation, mental health, and the desperate measures one mother will take to maintain a semblance of control. As Linda’s life unravels, she finds an unlikely confidante in James, portrayed by A$AP Rocky, whose presence further complicates her already chaotic existence. Meanwhile, Caroline, played by Danielle Macdonald, becomes entangled in Linda’s struggles, adding another layer of complexity to the intricate web of relationships. As Linda spirals, she seeks guidance from Dr. Spring, played by Mary Bronstein, whose unorthodox methods challenge Linda’s perception of reality, blurring the lines between sanity and madness. “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You” is a poignant yet darkly humorous exploration of a woman on the edge, desperately clinging to the fragments of her shattered life.

If I Had Legs I'd Kick You Movie Poster Images

If I Had Legs I'd Kick You Movie Poster Image

Movie Trailers

A24 x Letterboxd: The List – Mary Bronstein & Conan O'Brien

Wine Tasting with Rose Byrne and Mary Bronstein – Official Promo

If I Had Legs I’d Kick You Movie FAQs

What is the movie “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You” about?

It’s a drama comedy about a woman named Linda navigating her child’s illness, her absent husband, a missing person, and a strained relationship with her therapist.

What genres does the movie belong to?

The movie is categorized as Drama and Comedy.

Who directed “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You”?

Mary Bronstein directed the movie.

Who are the main actors in the movie?

The movie stars Rose Byrne, Conan OBrien and ASAP Rocky.

When was “If I Had Legs I’d Kick You” released?

The movie was released on October 10, 2025.

What is the runtime of the movie?

The movie has a runtime of 113 minutes.

Which production companies were involved in the movie?

A24, Central Pictures, Fat City and Bronxburgh were the production companies involved.

What is the tagline for the movie?

The tagline is “Everything is under control.”

What is the IMDb ID for the movie?

The IMDb ID is tt18382850.

What is the vote average for the movie?

The vote average is 6.9 with 14 votes.

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